Is The Oscars the most boring event on TV? For how long does it drone on? Who are 95% of the “celebrities”? Is The Oscars the ultimate sedative?

So a bunch of “celebrities”, most of whom we’ve never heard and the rest of whom we wished we hadn’t, saunter down the red carpet in their very best attire. Ladies flow and pout in prestigious designer dresses from the likes of Alberta Ferretti, Stella McCartney, Versace, Michael Kors, Giorgio Armani…the list goes on and on… Guys strut and frown in exquisite designer suits from the likes of Hugo Boss, Ermenegildo Zegna, Valentino, Prada, Dolce & Gabbana and likewise the illustrious list goes on and on… and all us fashion plebes around the world argue about who looks hot and who doesn’t and we all start to get excited and then we remember it’s The Oscars!